Following the Thread

You know you may be crocheting way too much when you dream about rolling up biots of super chunky red/black yarn, dipping it in nacho cheese sauce and eating it and it doesn’t occur that this isn’t normal until you wake up.

I have a lot of projects going on.  I do things like this every once in a while when I just overload myself.  I’m still making charity caps; I’ve got about 15 right now.  The charity blanket is on hold.  I’m almost done crocheting my mom’s felted purse, better finish that soon.  Then I got the urge to do something for Breast Cancer Awareness month and since I don’t have money to donate, decided to increase awareness and am making a bunch of pink scarves for the women I am close to.  I have an amazing amount of oink yarn in my stash for someone who really doesn’t like the color.

Then to top it all off, I am going to a costume ball in October and will probably have to make my costume and I’ve decided to make a cape, b ut not just any cape.  I am going to do it like a crazy quilt.  All black fabrics, black, white and silver threads for the embroidery and then some sashiko style quilted motifs with glow-in-the-dark threads that look white in the light.  I’m not starting that one until the crocheting is done though.

I think I know why I have taken on so many projects.  It’s the same reason my house is a mess and all I want to do is sleep whenever I sit down at home.

I feel like I am drowning.  Because of financial problems and a sense of dissatisfaction in my workaday life I am becoming depressed again.  Scares me.  I’ve been there before, I don’t want to be there again, so I am trying to distract myself with so many projects.  Yarn is so much softer than my thoughts.  I’ll get through it again, but it is so hard when I am in the middle of the emotional flood.

Sorry about the downer ending.  I always write about it better than I can talk about it.  My family gets freaked out when I mention it, so I don’t talk to them about it.  I’ll probably write it out in my journal today and hope I get past today’s flood.

I guess I could erase that up there, but I think I’ll leave it.  It’s part of me.